


Through His Eyes

by LoveRoqs



Series: ~And for once, I can see~ [1]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2018-01-30
Packaged: 2018-12-05 02:05:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11568063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveRoqs/pseuds/LoveRoqs
Summary: This is a world wherein one can see a part of their soulmate's day through their dreams- called 'The Snippet Phase'. Once the Snippet Phase starts, that means the dreams will come in a pattern, appearing consistently before you meet your soulmate/s.





	1. Trixya p.1

**Author's Note:**

> Soulmate AU that I made up in one sitting. (This means, this AU is MINE)  
> I could not STRESS enouh that this is MINE. This AU is mine, I own it and you need MY EFFIN PERMISSION TO EFFIN USE IT GODDAMMIT.  
> If you want to use it, please ask/credit ME.  
> That means if you wanna make a drarry fic using this specific soulmate AU, ask me first. Even if you modify it by calling the snippet phase a different name- it's still MINE.  
> No, I'm not making any money from this and this is an RPF. This is my fanfition and my AU.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katya gets snippets two nights ahead of Trixie. So After Katya got the vegetarian snippet, he had a day to accept it, and another day to watch vegetarian cooking shows. Trixie gets her snippet on the third night after Katya. Katya's snippets comes every five days, Trixie's come every ten days. Thus why Trixie made a list, so the little she knows about her soulmate she can remember.

Brian stuck his tongue out at Sang who rolled his eyes.

"can you stop talking about your soulmate and focus on the list?" Sang asked

"You don't understand, it's my third snippet and already he's grocery shopping to make sure he's acquainted with my vegetarian needs... It's sweet..." Brian says

"okay, okay, it's sweet, but can you focus on OUR grocery shopping, you know that I have to pack today-

"Okay, I'll do it. When are you gonna get back, again?"

"Pearl said it'll only be for four days, and then I'll be back. It's a quick makeup-job." Sang tells him

"while you're snagging makeup jobs in New York, I'll be here... doing drag... at Roscoe's... with Shea... and Gia..."

Sang gave him one last look before abandoning the table. Brian rolled his own eyes as he took the pen and checked the grocery list. Honestly, he didn't even know why Kim wanted to make a grocery list- it's not like they bought a lot, mostly just vegetables, fruits, sugar, soy milk, sugar, sugar ummm... and so on... Yeah, okay maybe they do need the list.

While grocery shopping, Brian couldn't help but remember and smile at the snippet he got last night.

* * *

On his first snippet two weeks ago, he found out that his soulmate lives with his best friend, both of them are also drag queens. Because what guy would keep wigs and dresses in their wardrobe, right? And look at that, his soulmate loves the color pink- so his soulmate probably hopefully won't have a problem with his Reds. Unfortunately, his soulmate was in the middle of organizing his drag that week- due to Sang, the best friend's insistence, so no, he didn't get to see how his soulmate looked via mirror. After five days, he got a second snippet, which made him learn that his soulmate's name is also Brian, which is making him feel like they're really meant to be- he also found out that his soulmate used to be depressed too before moving to Chicago a few years back. A night ago he found out that his soulmate is actually vegetarian. So he decided it would be a good idea to start getting familiar with the non-meats.

Today, Brian woke up early with a mission. He'll be watching how to make vegetarian meals so he can perfect them before he meets his soulmate, because duh, all the good cooking shows air early for the house wives. The idea of himself as a housewife makes him grin, then later today, he'll be grocery shopping. Tomorrow, he starts healthy living- Brian couldn't wait.

* * *

The thought that his soulmate went grocery shopping yesterday just after the Asian morning show about healthy eating made Brian very happy. Did his soulmate pick the squeaky push cart by accident too? Did his soulmate pass by that same brand of cereals? What vegetarian dish did his soulmate plan to make? How did his soulmate place the items on the cart? In what order did his soulmate buy things?

A few more weeks later, Drag Race Season 6 Cast was announced and Wang's held a congratulatory party for Gia, the same way that Berlin held one for Phi Phi and Dida. Trixie noticed that the Asian's usual smile didn't reach her eyes, Trixie chalked it up that maybe she was just sent home early or something. But it was very much more than that.

Turns out, Gia was thinking of transitioning, and she found out that her soulmate's gay but not very supportive of Drag Queens or Transgendered people. Gia was worried that her soulmate might get a snippet of her transitioning and might not approve of it.

"don't worry girl... I'm sure he'll love you for you... because you're soulmates... and if you don't match up, then you just don't... be who you want to be, don't be apologetic about that..." Trixie tells her

Shea nods along while watching Trannika host the scene on stage. "yeah, girl, also... Trannika's running out of things to say, we might wanna move things along-

Gia takes a deep breath. "thank you girls"

"anytime..."

"do you ever have those... doubts?" Shea asked Trixie once Gia was back on stage.

Trixie looked at Shea in the eyes and said; "no, my soulmate is perfect"

Shea raised an eyebrow with a lopsided smirk. "really? you sure?"

"in the span of twelve snippets, I've learned so much about the person that I'm meant to spend the rest of my life with, of course I'm sure he's perfect" Trixie says confidently

"Kim said you had a lot to say about your soulmate in your list." Shea says

"fuck off"

"seriously, you really did make a list?"

Trixie didn't answer and begin to de-drag. He was no longer needed for the night, therefore he can go home now. While de-dragging and ignoring Shea's teasing, Trixie's mind drifts to the list, which he made after the fourth snippet;

_1\. My soulmate is a smoker._

_2\. My soulmate can write- and speak Russian._

_3\. My soulmate is not a vegetarian._

_4\. My soulmate's first vegetarian dish is Grilled Tofu Tacos. ridiculous._

_5\. My soulmate used to be a drug addict and alcoholic. But he's clean and sober now so..._

_6\. My soulmate apparently has a fake diary?_

_7. My soulmate owns a lot of red drag things._

_8\. My soulmate is around Boston. And his name is Katya in drag._

_9\. My soulmate is a fan of Alaska Thunderfuck. Therefore he watches Drag Race too._

_10\. My soulmate is flexible as fuck._

_11\. My soulmate can't sing._

_12\. My soulmate wheezes like a dying seal._

_13\. My soulmate has some sort of depressing story line, which could maybe be just as bad as mine?_

* * *

Katya was scared. Trixie didn't smoke, didn't do drugs, is vegetarian, has virgin friends, was Prom King, is younger and is practically a precious baby. From the twenty four snippets, he concluded that Trixie or Brian is just maybe slightly out of Katya's league? Well, it didn't matter. He already told his mother and his siblings that he was going to be on Drag Race, and that flight cost money- he can't miss it.

It is what it is.

And maybe if he didn't win, at least he got to meet his soulmate? right?

* * *

Trixie was sure he was due to meet her soulmate today. He knew because the second to the last snippet that he got was of Katya calling his mom to say that he got on Drag Race Season 7. The last two snippets he got were just Katya preparing himself- he knew as well that they were both going to be meeting in the workroom. Something that bothered Trixie was that their romantic life will therefore be forever public.

"okay, we're ready for you, Trixie" the male producer said

The male producer obviously didn't have any idea at all about what he's sentencing Trixie into. Trixie breathed in deeply, he was nervous, he wished Kim or Shea was here to snap back at her or something. At least Pearl would be here too... that's good.

Trixie entered the work room, aware that Katya has never seen her in drag, nor did he ever see Katya in drag. That's because Trixie didn't look in mirrors enough times a day. Or because fate just didn't want anyone to really see their soulmate's face before their meeting? Who knew?

At the last second, he decided to withdrew the map from his bag that he found earlier.

"This isn't Maury Povich?!?" he asked upon entrance

It took every fiber of his being, every mental and physical strength for him to not look at the side. He had to look straight and model for the camera for a straight twenty seconds. He had to ignore the voices that were just to his left, the pull that he felt.

 _'one alligator, two alligator, three alligator'_ he counts as he pose, every second making him feel as if he was being tested _'eighteen alligator, nineteen alligator, twenty'_

He took a very deep breath, turning left, and straight to locking eyes with blue orbs. They were both not wearing contacts today. Trixie's face broke out in a wide grin, so did Katya's. Trixie was rooted to the spot as he looked down shyly, and noticed he was overwhelmed. Katya wasted no time, immediately crossing the floor. Katya paused just in front of Trixie. The camera-man was unsure of what was going on, but he had a feeling that he couldn't queue the next queen to come in yet.

"so" Katya wondered why just a two-lettered word came out so shaky, but at the same time, he knew.

Trixie shrugged his arms, unsure if they should hug or touch hands or-

Katya immediately jumped into him. And boom! White light. His legs wrapped around Trixie's waist, his arms wrapped around Trixie's neck, and Trixie's face buried in Katya's chest. It was like electricity, Trixie had to quickly grab Katya's butt to prevent her from falling, and that butt was firm too, red spandex and all.

Everybody was practically blinded when the white glow appeared. For ten seconds straight the whole staff and the queens were in awe. The light was very pure and it was such a display of the good things in life. Nobody obviously wanted to break them apart.

"Tofu Tacos, anyone?" Katya asked, looking only at Trixie, who was still holding her like a baby.

Trixie chuckled as he puts Katya down. "you're so weird"

"are you guys soulmates, meeting here for the first time?" Meesh, the infamous female producer asked them intimidatingly.

Katya nodded enthusiastically.

"okay..." the producer responds

"ummm... this won't be an issue, will it?" Trixie asked

Last season, it was revealed on the second episode that Bianca and Courtney were soulmates. And then at the same episode, it ended with a reveal that Courtney and Adore touched and glowed as well. It was an epic cliffhanger, and then it revealed that the three of them were a triad on the Snatch Game episode. A very talented triad at that, even if all three of them weren't allowed to help each other out and were assigned different work stations- all three of them still made it to the top three with Bianca winning.

"not at all, just... the usual, the NDA still stands, and different workstations will be assigned... but you can exchange room numbers later..." Meesh says

"yeah, that could work" Katya shrugged

Trixie nods as well, nothing matters. As long as he gets to be with Katya.


	2. Naochi p.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One sided soulmates exists. There were seventeen recorded cases, and only six of them got maritally bonded. There were two other cases in which the one that got the snippets would get their partner to glow every time they touched them, instead of only glowing once together.
> 
> Naomi is the snippee, Kim is the glowee.

The quickest Snippet Phase recorded is Seven Hours and Twelve Minutes to a pair of highschoolers. The longest Snippet Phase recorded is Two Years and Six days, for every eleven days, Abraham Lincoln would dream of snippets from Mary Todd's day.

In Naomi's case it's been Seven Months and two days. Snippets come every four nights. Much as she wants to get drunk on Fridays, she much rather prefers to see what 'Kim' has done the day before.

"I came to chop suey the competition!"

Naomi froze. He's here. Fucking finally. But also, shit. He does not want to turn this into another ABC vs Everyone or another Trixya vs Everyone situation.

Naomi waits. Acid gave Kim a hug first, "Wow, I know what this is inspired from."

Naomi felt Kim turn to her; "Hi... I'm Naomi..."

"Kim Chi"

"yeah, I know... Can I, like, hug you now or something?"

Kim looked at Naomi weirdly.

Oh no. What if Kim doesn't want to publicize their relationship? What if Kim has a boyfrie-

"uh, sure... Okay."

Naomi felt like she'd split her mouth from the big grin she's wearing. She spreads her arms and then envelops Kim Chi in a big bear hug.

"woah! You guys, we have a winner!" Acid Betty announces

" _ **or**_ two runner ups" Robbie comments

"nooo, why is Kim the only one glowing?" Naysha asks aloud

Kim breaks from the hug, confused-

"Nobody move from their spot! Is this a joke?" Michel Mills asks Naomi as she storms into the workroom, sliding her headset down her neck. She's gonna have a lot to talk about with the editors today.

"no... We're soulmates..."

"What? When? I didn't get any snippets." Kim states

Naysha and Cynthia were gaping.

"but-

Naomi lets her fingers brush against Kim as she reaches out, and Kim starts glowing for a good few seconds. It was a bright, blinding and sacred light like all others before it.

"One sided soul-mates. Sorry girl..." Robbie says

"but... What does that mean?" Naomi asks

Acid recites sadly; "In most cases they meet, no glowing, and get over it. In other cases, they meet, neither glows, the snippee tell the other one that's never gotten a snippet that they're soulmates, they try to date, it works out- sometimes it doesn't. In only two other cases there's a glo-

"There's a glowee and a snippee! Oh My God, I've read about this before! The last pair was back in the 1720-

"1728 but yes, Naysha." Robbie corrects

"so... You're my soulmate?"

Kim nods and frowns; "but you're not mine..."

"send the next clown in" Michel states but before she left, she paused, looks at Naomi and says; "sorry"

Naomi was downcast.

* * *

"Mom! I found my soulmate today!"

Raja's eyes widen as Naomi approached the photoshoot. "Did you finally get his boy name?"

"uh no, not yet-

"Don't forget to pose, Everyone!" Mathu announces

Naomi posed with a big fake smile that Raja clocks immediately. "what's wrong?"

"our soulmate bond is one sided... You won't even believe, I've made her glow, like seven times already!" Naomi says as she moves to another pose.

"that's a very rare case, next pose!" Mathu comments

"I know-

"wait! which girl is it?"

"Kim Chi. You'll love her, he's Korean, he's a makeup artist, he can sew, he's Trixie's drag sister wife whatever-

"Whatever? What does that mean?" Jinkx asks

"They're roommates..."

"Oh, do you think maybe they used to date?"

"I don't think so"

"Isn't Trixie the runner up from last season?" Sharon whispers to Jinkx

"Yeah, she's soulmates with the Russian one, Katya?"

An irritated look crosses Violet's face. It seems wherever she goes, her season just can't be known without mentioning the third runner up, and the Miss Congeniality winner. Even Ginger knew the feeling.

"Last shot!"

Sharon Needles made a face as the camera clicked for the last time.

"and that's a wrap, Thank you, Naomi!"

* * *

"when did you first get a snippet and what was it about?" Sang asks, now completely out of drag.

"It was a Saturday evening, and it was about you living in Chicago, because you were sitting on a stool at Roscoes"

"awww... Was I drinking?"

"no, you were watching Trixie relive her drag race experience on stage"

"oh, that old tired-ass number?"

"I can't believe she still lives with you-

"she's moving to L.A. soon, I'm moving in with someone else"

"a boyfriend?"

"just a friend"

"Oh... Uhm, can you help me untie this corset?"

Bob hollered at that; "Oooh Lovebirds!"

* * *

"are you gonna be able to carry that at all?" Sang asks

"I know, right? Are you worried about me, daddy?"

Robbie interrupts as he passes through; "girl, too real!"

"This boat pretty much covers up the only thing I love about my body!"

"which part? Your cliffhangers?" Sang asks subtly

Robbie, Acid, Derrick and Bob all gasped audibly.

"Girl, she just read you for filth!" Chi Chi announced after she snapped her fingers.

Davis smirked and touched the tip of Sang's nose. Sang was glowing again.

"please stop purposely doing that" Dax exclaims

"no promises!"

When the safe girls were declared, the judges began giving their individual critiques. While Michelle Visage was geeking over how much a nerd Kim Chi is, Laila threw Naomi under the bus.

"Do you think you should go home?" RuPaul asks Naomi.

"...Uhm, No. Cuz, like, my challenge wasn't to just present a look but to also showoff a pride parade boat. And my boat looks really nice so I think I succeeded in my challenge." Naomi shrugs

* * *

"I was the only one that had to throw someone under the bus-

"but do I really not impress you?"

Robbie began as Laila sipped on her drink; "I mean... Did you intentionally not pad, is that your aesthetic? I'm not... I don't-

"did you intentionally cut a square of fabric and wrapped it around yourself?" Kim cuts in

Naomi's eyes widen.

"oh my God! You are going to be the shadiest, mouthiest bitch, aren't you?!?" Bob exclaimed

"Going to be? I think she already is" Chi Chi adds

"I like it, who would've thought, the kind Korean Makeup artist came to play after all." Derrick says

"her cute anime aesthetic is just a character" Thorgy states

Kim laughed at this. Then all attention was on her when Naomi suddenly decides to flop her head on Kim's right side.

"what happens if Naomi doesn't let go, does that mean Kim won't stop glowing?" Thorgy asks

"no, the glowing will still only last ten seconds" Acid answers knowingly just as Kim's light fades but Naomi was still leaning on her.

* * *

When Sang revealed about his virginity, Davis kindly didn't comment about it or ask questions. Instead, Davis spent the car ride home talking about how much he loved getting hugged by bigger people.

"If you mean bigger, as in anyone able to crush you... Bitch, literally everyone in this car is bigger than you!" Bob says

* * *

The second milestone of their relationship- er, acquaintanceship was after the Snatch Game episode.

Naomi had just survived the lip sync against Acid Betty.

Throughout the car ride to the hotel, Sang held Davis' hand tightly- as if to reassure himself that Davis is still there.

Although they were not told to exchange hotel room numbers, they did it anyways. Once escorted to their rooms, there was literally nothing for them to do but sleep. Mostly because even most of the night staff were working half-asleep.

Davis didn't expect that half an hour later, there would be a knock on his door. Thinking it was a staff, he peeked into the peephole and sees Sang. He immediately opens the door.

"what're you doing here!?!"

"breaking the rulth, You almoth got eliminated becath they told you to wear the kimono and becath I agreed that you thoud thwitch characterh for thnatch game"

"your lisp really is heavier when you're upset... Uhm, come in..."

A few minutes later, they were laying on Davis' bed, Davis' head was under Sang's chin and Sang's right hand was drawing patterns on Davis' back.

"But like, seriously though, if you ever feel like you're gonna fail at something, you have to come to me, so like, I can help you... I don't wanna make it to the end without you either" Davis whispered

Sang hummed. "then you should too, but we're not gonna conspire against anyone, that's gonna make us look bad"

"you never look bad though, you're too adorable... It's sort of why I like you..."

"Sort of?"

"I like you, Sang. I like you the moment I realized that I can search for you online. Thank God you're not as old as Katya to, like, only create social media accounts just after Drag Race. I can't stress enough the fact that I didn't know if I should text you, or whatever but I was so scared of this amazing, gorgeous Drag Queen that's my soulmate!"

"I like you too... Davis..."

"I like that you can talk about RPG games for hours, I like that you have a separate laptop with all sorts of anime stuff, I like that you're just super creative with everything, I like that you're dedicated to your culture, I like-

"You know what I hate? That I didn't get any snippets."

"you do?"

"I do... "

"Awww Kimmy!!! I hate that too! I wish I could be your soulmate, cuz I really wanna kiss you."

Davis cringed at what just came out of his mouth, tension was thick in the air. Neither one dared to move, then after a good solid minute or so, Sang finally says;

"Okay, why don't you?"

Davis' eyes widen. He smiles as he removed his head carefully out from under Sang's chin. Gently, ever so gently, Davis connects their lips together. Davis' left hand clutched Sang's right shoulder, and Sang's right arm was wrapped around Davis' back.

Davis doesn't know how it was for Sang but for him, it was the best kiss he's ever experienced, basically.


	3. ABC p.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ABC p.1 "A Triad in Competition"
> 
> StinkySocks to vote for what pairing should be for Chapter 4. Options are Shalaska, Trixya p.2 , Naochi p.2 , Farraja, and the Manila Monologue (starts off as Manila/Sahara)

"Is this America's Next Top Model? ...oh, sorry"

Bianca laughed at the Australian's joke. She's heard of the Aussie before, when the Aussie was on Australian Idol. This will be the first time they will properly meet outside of the customer-supplier relationship.

"Hi, I'm Courtney."

"Hello Courtney!" Joslyn excitedly shakes hands.

Bianca offers her hand; "Bianca"

When Courtney touched hands with her, something unremarkable and unexpected happens. They were glowing, their heart glowed first, slowly spreading throughout their bodies, all the way to the tips of their toes, to the ends of their hair. Then the ten seconds were up far too quickly.

Talking with Courtney the next two days confirmed that Bianca has two soulmates; Courtney claimed to be vegan, Courtney knows how to sew, Courtney prefers singing in the bath tub, and Courtney is friends with Willam.

Courtney couldn't be the one that likes getting high every so often, she couldn't be the one eating pizza almost every week, she couldn't be the one that has a messily kept apartment, and she also couldn't be the one with messy looking wigs.

Courtney knew that she had another soulmate, in her head she's concluded that the second soulmate must be the unrequited one, because they didn't meet. Bianca knew better and didn't speak about it.

So when the challenge was over and Bianca had won, they came to enter the workroom and was shocked to be greeted by none other than the other batch of girls.

"Hi, I'm so glad I'm not the only Idol contestant here!" Adore greets Courtney who didn't even get a chance to reply because suddenly they were both glowing.

Courtney froze in shock;

"wait, didn't Courtney and Bianca glow already?" Joslyn asked dumbfounded

Bianca glared at Joslyn, then she looked at Courtney, confused.

"I don't, I just assumed... B?"

"I don't fucking know, what is this? Asian drama, love triangle bullshit?"

"wait whut?" Adore asks

"Well, Adore... The thing is, when I met Biancar yesterday, we, both of us, glored. And now you and I glored. So, uhm, I have two soulmates?"

Adore was nodding with her eyes wide and the confusion clear on her face.

"your Aussie is showing" Bianca murmured

* * *

_"I would still be able to love both of them and win, that isn't a problem. Having two soulmates is a weird concept, I knew triads exists, and there are one sided soulmates, and unrequited soulmates. But two soulmates... I feel very special, I don't think I've ever read something about this before."_

* * *

Three days later, it was apparent that Bianca disliked Adore heavily.

"your other soulmate hates me..." Danny whined as she was sat on Shane's couch.

Shane chuckled as she hands Danny a bowl of salad. "she doesn't hate you, she's just intimidated because you're both my soulmate, and maybe she doesn't like being put in what seems like another competition while already competing for the crown."

"intimidated? She doesn't even look nervous"

"Yes well, you two are quite opposites. Not just in terms of your skills but-

"have you two fucked yet?"

Courtney paused at the question. How exactly was she suppose to answer this?

"you can say yes, I won't be mad!"

"no, we haven't had full sex, but we've cuddled plenty..."

Adore was on her immediately. "I like this, Court."

Courtney pats the back of Adore's head.

"yeahr"

* * *

Bianca was unfocused, she kept dreaming of her other soulmate's day but she keeps forgetting it by morning. She doesn't understand but she keeps looking at the plant in the hotel lobby like it means something.

Then today, Laganja was off her rocker during Untucked. Claiming it was her "moment" because Bianca made a joke during the wrong time.

Courtney won this week, because she brought the theatrics and Bianca couldn't be more proud.

A few days later, after Ru announced that it was time for Snatch Game, Adore came over to Bianca's workstation with a mission.

"hey, can I talk to you?"

Bianca raised an eyebrow.

"Listen, if you hate queens younger than you so much, you need to learn to deal with it because we both want to stay in Courtney's life and we will never stop being younger than you. What you did to Laganja, that was mean, you didn't need to bully her like you've been bullying me to get the point across. Like, I so get that you hate me. Don't drag my friends into this."

"alright"

"alright? That's it? You'll at least try to get along with us, right?"

Bianca shrugged "we'll see, you do anything stupid and I'll call you out on it, bitch"

"thank you" Adore says, promptly grabbing Bianca's arm for emphasis

What happened next was a shock to most everyone. The two rivaling queens glowed. Some say that was what solidified the top three. Some say that was the moment Bianca won.

But for both parties involved, that was the moment they understood; Why everything about the other one peeved them, made them insecure, and made them frustrated.

"well, we're a triad, then, this is very nice" Courtney's Aussie accent breaks the silence.

What added to the fire is when the producers decided to seat Adore and Bianca next to each other during Snatch Game. All the more reason not to fail, what with another soulmate that's gonna be sitting right next to you.


	4. Shalaska p.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So. I've been messing with Work Skins recently...  
> Hope y'all like this. Uhm, if anyone wants to mess with work skins too, y'all can message me and I'll teach you. Basic colors and Image backgrounds are easy to do- also dividers like my hearts, but you have to follow my instructions to the T. and also create a 'No Fandom' Work so I can see what you're doing.

_**Flashback 1 - Season 4 Episode 2:** _

"wait, you are boyfriends with another drag queen?" Jiggly asks

"and you're not even soulmates?" Phi Phi buts in

"Yeah, she's another queen, her name's Alaska Thunderfuck and we've been together for almost four years."

"that is disgusting, I don't ever see myself date another queen-

"let alone someone that isn't even your soulmate, like why?" Phi Phi asks

Sharon frowned but didn't show how much their comments angered her. Before she can form a rebuttal, Willam curves the conversation to him;

"I'm soulmates with my husband but we have an open relationship, which is great cuz growing up, I didn't like the idea of being tied to just one person."

"you're a whore"

"yeah, I am" Willam snort-laughs

Later on, In the Interior Illusions lounge, Chad comforts Sharon- she was tearing up because Alaska popped up on screen.

* * *

_**February 6, 2012:** _

The episode aired and Aaron rolled his eyes. Comparing the hate he gets now to the hate he got from Phi Phi and Jiggly- he felt he toughened up because of that. Now, he didn't cry when someone criticizes the validity of his and Justin's relationship. Instead he tries to always hold Justin in case either of them cry or get angry from frustration.

"Thank fuck we don't have to host tonight." Justin says as he hands him a Pabst.

Aaron says nothing as he takes it and tucks himself under Justin's chin. Justin lets out a puff of black smoke, Aaron's nose scrunched; "should that be black?"

"ugh, yeah... I forget you had to be clean for two months and a half-

"it felt like two years and a half, pass that over"

"you know what sucks?" Justin asks

"what?"

"How gay people stick to the stigma that you can't date unless the person is your soulmate. And the fact that only few people outside the gay community are okay with dating before the snippet phase."

"baby, the world is still very traditional, this is the time we live in, by the time they accept dating pre-snippet phase, there'll probably be cars floating around already..." Aaron tells him after he exhales black smoke.

Justin sucks the second-hand smoke in, and let it out by forming rings. "if your soulmate didn't die, would you have come out to your parents instead of running away?"

"I don't know, pumpkin... I don't know..."

* * *

_**April 13, 2012 - First Day of Rehearsals:** _

"Alright, can we please get them in formation five, that's the one with just the top three. Okay, the rest can go- be back here tomorrow, 9 AM sharp, okay, queens?" Michelle's voice echoed

Justin and Willam's husband both braced themselves for the gaggle of queens entering backstage. Willam directly seats herself between Justin and Bruce; "can you get me a Starbucks, please?"

"ugh, right now?"

"yeah, we can have dinner at Olive Garden later, but I want them to join us" Willam cocks her head to Justin

"sure, okay"

"do you remember my order?"

Bruce gives him a nod. Willam slaps his ass before he leaves, then Willam turns to Justin. "so, like, how do you feel about appearing in a cameo for a music video that I'm making? ...I'll pay you."

"do I have to be naked?"

"no, just get in, like, wild, club kid drag... you can do that, right? I've seen your shit before you moved back to Pittsburgh... You know Detox, right?"

"Dita Icunt, yeah, why?"

"We're working together now, some girl group thing. The video I'm making is mine and I wanna put it up before we get the girl group thing down."

"okay, sure"

"good, you and Sharon are coming to dinner with us, I'm paying... By the way, do you do coke?"

Justin smiles, he just knows that this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

* * *

_**April 31, 2012 - Day After Sharon's Crowning:** _

"she's already getting booked places I didn't even know existed inside the gay community" Justin says, he was smoking a cigarette in the fire exit while Willam's on the other end of the call.

"so? are you jealous?"

"and scared... I trust him, but...-

"you're not soulmates and everyone knows it? so what? you two love each other more than I love shoes, that's saying something so don't be scared, be proud that he's yours and all that lovey dovey crap- listen, I can't get a damn cab in New York so I gotta call someone, but you text me, okay bitch?"

"okay, thanks Willam"

Justin finished his cigarette just in time for the coffee maker to finish. He proceeds to make Aaron's sugar-filled coffee. Justin doesn't understand how Aaron can stand sweet coffee but he makes sure it's sweet enough for his other half anyways.

* * *

Today marked the second week of Sharon's absence. Everyday Justin can feel Sharon get more and more tired- probably because of the gigs, sleepless nights, flights and so on but Justin can't help but think maybe Sharon's getting tired of him.

The only thing Justin knew for sure is that Sharon will be in Pittsburgh to promote Drag U and All Stars Season 1. When? Justin wasn't sure.

* * *

_**May 2012 - What happened in Florida:** _

"Come with us, Alaska. Get yourself out of that funk, girl!" Veruca La'Piranha insists

"Yeah, it's only for three days- more or less. It's gonna be fun! Plus, the flights nowadays are so cheap, just two nights worth of tips even!" Cherri Baum adds

"but you guuuyyys, what if Sharon comes back from Berlin?"

"leave her a note, and ask Peaches to babysit your little monster"

"I'll think about it, okay?"

Cherri rolls her eyes, "Well be quick about it, the wedding's on the 21st, we need to fly before the 19th if we wanna go clubbing in Miami."

"Miami, Alaska. Mi.a.mi."

"yeah, V, I heard you"

Once Justin was back in their apartment, he had nothing to do except face the true fact that he was stuck here in shitty Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania while Aaron was probably getting treated like a star in Beverly Hills, California. Yeah, maybe going to Florida is a good idea- change of scenery and all that. And it's a lesbian couple wedding- it could be fun.

...

"Holy shit bitch, what hurricane swept past here?" Peaches asked

"fuck off, I've already tried to clean up"

"whatever, where's the cat?"

"in his carrier, hold on"

Once Justin hands Peaches the carrier, he instantly felt like he just gave away a precious child.

"Please remember to feed her. She isn't really a handful. You can even just leave her alone for a whole day, she doesn't mind... Text me if she needs anything?"

"yeah, uhm, is it okay if I don't feed him cat food? What if I gave him rice and sauces and soup?"

"less money for me to pay you, so go ahead"

...

_Hey I heard you were a wild one_

_Oooh, If I took you home it'd be a home run_

_Show me how you do._

_I want to shut down the club, w_ _ith you._

_Hey I heard you like the wild ones_

_Oooh_

...

The wedding was yesterday, and today Veruca took them to a local gay club. The music of the club never felt so right as Justin eyed an older looking brunette.

Now, if Justin did decide to sleep with this guy, it wouldn't be the first time he 'cheats' on Aaron- because it's not like it would mean anything, it's just sex, right? So why not?

Later on, when Cherri tattles to Peaches who tattles to Sharon, Alaska would be punished in the form of humiliation. As the kinky egotistical high bitch, Sharon wanted to parade Alaska around as a dog.

Which is fine, whatever, she deserved it.

* * *

**_'Distance makes the Heart grow fonder.'_** Yeah right. More like distance is the best thing that could happen to them right now. Aaron thinks.

The thought of Justin cheating on him made him really mad- because he never, not even on tour, not even drunk, never ever did he look at another man's ass. How could Justin do this to him? It was heart breaking, he couldn't even look at Justin the same without feeling insecure, thoughts like _'is there something lacking in me?', 'am I not enough?', 'what's wrong with me?'_ and so on.

The second night that Justin was gone- when Aaron was sure Justin had landed in L.A. into the arms of the Drag Race Staff, Aaron went out. His mission? get high, get smashed, and get laid.

Later on, he'd have little to no recollection of that night. But one fan knew who he was, and one fan didn't just theorized that Alaska was filming Season 5- that fan theorized that Shalaska is on the brink of breaking up. That one fan took to social media, of course, to recount Aaron's wild night. Being the 

* * *

_**After Season 5 - May 6, 2013:** _

Alaska just threw a tantrum after Jinkx was officially crowned. Now, Patricia and Cory, along with Aaron, Michelle and even Meesh trails after him as he storms into his hotel room. Jinkx was shocked and followed them as well, mostly because hers and Alaska's room are side by side. Roxxxy's still in the lounge somewhere with Detox, Coco and a few other RuGirls. Alyssa was behind Jinkx, looking amused like she's watching a show.

"why is my fucking door fucking locked?!? Open this stupid door, I need to get in, NOW!!!"

Jinkx cringed at the older queen. Aaron rolls his eyes, and apparently Alaska saw this and threw a glove his way, which the bleach blonde dodges easily. Once Alaska was subdued, Alyssa asks Aaron something, to which he responds;

"are you kidding? I've dodged bottles of beers in a dark nightclub, her nail gloves are nothing!"

* * *

Screaming matches became a part of their ritual, no queen or RuGirl even wants to be near them when the insults starts getting hurled.

_**Smash** _

Jiggly flinched at the sound of broken glass. It was her first time touring with the season 5 girls. It was BOTS. Pandora, Latrice, Coco and Jinkx all shared exasperated looks.

"you get used to it girl..." Manila tells her

"and she's known 'shalaska' for three-

"four years, just as long as their relationship, back when they were just as crazy" Manila clarifies

"do they always do that?"

"well sometimes the bottles aren't completely empty..." Jinkx answered

Latrice fans herself; "It's going to be hell for Michelle when she goes to live with them for Halloween. Girl..."

"For an October gig, in New York, right?" Coco asks

"Alaska's undeniably Michelle's favorite, do you guys wanna bet she'll say something?" Pandora smiles

"why not?" Manila shrugs "Willam's gonna be with them too, right?"

* * *

When Aaron walked out angry, and a little stoned he went ahead to the bar with a wallet full of twenties and fifties, not knowing that Michelle was there the whole time listening quietly to the fight that had ensued.

Justin didn't know that going to the fire escape to smoke would lead Michelle to thinking he was going to jump.

"Alaska, what happened?" Michelle asks as she opened her window. She would climb the window to step out and grab Alaska if she had to, just in case.

Justin exhaled out smoke in a grand gesture before he leans on the other side of the railing so he could face her.

"I don't fucking know, I fucking hate my fucking life right now, Michelle. It's crazy, how I really want to hurt him, Michelle. Everything he does is fucking mentally hurting me. I am so torn, I am tortured, I can't stand to actually stand next to his stupid ass self. It's like, I actually want to be apart right now, ship me overseas tomorrow or something... What's worse? I'm waiting for him to hit me, actually hit me. God, it's a shit thing to hope for."

Michelle would say something, then Justin went off on another rant, Michelle would say something again, and Justin starts crying. Michelle figured maybe listening would work better, until Justin paused from his crying and looked up at Michelle. This was her chance to say something, and so she took it.

"If you're not happy, calm down, think about what it is you could really do to make this better for yourself. What about setting up goals? What about waiting for your soulmate? What about going forwards in life? You know, Alaska, there's nothing certain in life, except for change. Change is certain, and you can make it happen. You don't need to be ashamed to leave- if that is what you think should be done. If you want to stay and fix things, there's still alot that should change because you and I know that these arguments cannot continue. Baby, you and Aaron deserve so much more than this instead of feeling horrible together."

* * *

_**Flashback 2 - Holy Trannity Halloween Tour 2013;** _

It was simple really, Shalaska November tour, right before Alaska's booked to fly in Los Angeles for Christmas Queens, Justin finally says it.

"we need to break up"

Which resulted in their first physical fight, Aaron walks out of the bathroom, smelling like puke and beer. Justin repeats what he says as he starts packing. Aaron disagrees and was full on insisting that _"no, we can make this work, please pumpkin",_ and Alaska thinks _'he hasn't called me that for months'_. They both get emotional and upset and Alaska throws the first punch, but it was really all Justin because Goddamn, Aaron, let me go!

And then they're both throwing fists, insults, slurs until Aaron didn't mean to but pushes Justin too hard that Justin ends up hitting his arm on one of the legs of the bed. Aaron didn't even look shocked, there was just anger there, and he was high. Justin frowned, forced his tears away as he stood up, grabbed his bags, and left. Aaron was still processing what just occurred.

It was days later when Aaron heard confirmation that he really can't do anything to fix their relationship anymore. Justin has blocked his number, Justin asked his manager not to be put with Sharon for a while, Justin publicized that there was a fight, and he confirmed that they've broken up even though there was no talking that happened. He was playing the 'we're exes but we're good exes' character, which confused Aaron alot.

When Christmas hit and Aaron was alone, with Joan Coady on the phone telling him to just apologize, Aaron realized he'd had enough, it was Alaska that cheated first, Alaska that hit first, and Alaska that decided to break it up. It was always Alaska that started things, and finished things, really...

* * *

_**2014;** _

Alaska's fan-favorite status did not went unnoticed by world of wonder, Brolaska was soon born, and Ru even tweeted about it and her single 'RuGirl'.

It basically became a label to the whole of Drag Race contestants circle. Then Alaska began touring outside of North and South America. But what really changed her career was the offer...

Jeremy flips his phone; "It's American Apparrell and they want you to become an Ad Girl along with two other drag queens..."

"...okay, and?"

"well, it's Willam... And Courtney Act"

"oh, the Aussie whose rumored for Season 6?"

"I don't even know how you know that, but yeah..."

Alaska hummed; "when am I due to fly back?"

"not until after April? I dunno, but we're recording your Hair thing in Scotland-

"the whole thing?"

"Just recording, didn't you wanna release the album by 2015?"

"it's not possible, I don't think, but I'm hoping it is by, like, before Season 6 ends?"

Jeremy thinks for a while; "well, I'm leaving you once we're back in America, you know I've got a piano thing-

"yeah, Congrats on that, by the way, I hope you do your best, you really deserve that"

Jeremy shrugs.

"I will try to come, if I can, I promise."

"it's okay, man, you're busy enough as it is!"

...

"woah, bitch, you're the other girl?!?" Willam exclaimed

"yeah, I just got back, and God, I need a ganja!"

Courtney straightened up at the mention of 'Ganja' like war flashbacks suddenly comes to haunt her.

"This is Courtney, by the way. Courtney, Alaska."

"Nice to meet you, your beat is actually really much better in person!"

"oh, you're a shady whore, aren't you?"

"we're gonna smoke, do you mind?"

"ugh yes, I do mind... You girls can hotbox in here, but please leave a window open, I'm going to buy myself a coffee... Do you want anything?"

Neither Queen answered, so Courtney shrugged and left.

"You. Have been pretty busy-

"not as busy as you, DWV tour? An album, another cameo?"

"My back's not right anymore man, I thought I had to get it done because of this accident-

"what happened?" Alaska asks as she lights the roll.

"I was so tired, I fell on stage during rehearsals, and the mother-daughter duo fucking laughed at me like it was funny. I don't appreciate that, by the way, then- Listen, this is the worst part, AND THEN when they THOUGHT that I was unconscious, I found out that the evil duo is drugging me. DRUGGING ME! Like putting pills in my drink. Those assholes!"

Alaska's eyes widen. Detox? And Vicky?

"No, no, no... Vicky was the one doing it, as a joke, she said. Well, it wasn't a really funny joke, it's fucking stupid. Detox knew and she didn't say nuthin, so I hate both of them. Sluts, right? So I got this Beatdown series going for me now-

"Yeah, I was gonna watch that, then I realized it's just you watching youtubers, which I like, but don't really get, so I just like your videos and click next."

...

Alaska couldn't help it. So she agreed to let 'Your Makeup is Terrible' and 'Nails' drop as singles before the entire album was finished.

Then, Nick had this crazy idea to 'get an Aftershow' he says. Which is basically filming what she or other RuGirls do behind the stage. It was something her manager encouraged, forcing her to be more techy than she wants to- which is good, because Alaska knows Justin can be a little too private sometimes.

* * *

_**2015;** _

Inspiration struck Justin as he watched Laganja Estranja sashay away.

"you can rap, right?"

"ugh, yeah...?"

"and you live in L.A.?"

"at the moment, mawma, you need somethin'?"

"Ugh, no, I'm actually trying sobriety right now, but I do need your help for a song that I'm gonna be recording, I need it done before June?"

...

Justin didn't mean to, but it just happened.

Willam kept looking at Justin while they recorded 'The Shade of it All' -which is NOT about Sharon or Aaron or whomever, stop looking at me like that, Willam!

...

_Now I'm trying to swim while I'm watching you fly_

_I'm feeling so low so I try to stay high_

_To fight away all this hurting_

_And I try to look strong, but I'm feeling so weak_

_I try to act big but you know that I'm small_

_The shade of it all..._

_Why's it gotta be like this?_

_I can't be the only one on earth to feel like this_

_Look around and I see, I've got the strength inside me_

_And it's been there,_

_Yeah it's been there..._

...

Alaska's 2015 Halloween tour was spent with, guess who? Sharon motherfucking Needles.

It was just as tense, just as frustrating, just as equally nerve-wrecking to perform with her like last time, but since she's sober now, Alaska showed nothing while inside Justin was literally cringing, hoping the ground swallows one of them.

What's her excuse other than sobriety? The camera she's holding to film both of them? Sharon with her Dracula costume, and herself with this cat getup.

God, it was ridiculous. But true, the whole "lost a boyfriend but gained a best friend" bullshit that they liked to repeat, the whole lying through their teeth when asked "are you okay?" by other queens. Alaska even had to admit, that yes, she did lose contact with Sharon for a hot minute because the wound was still fresh and she needed to keep it fresh to remind herself- himself, that no, Justin, don't go back to him.

And Sharon said she was very proud, but at the same time, it wasn't Sharon saying that, it was Aaron.

Justin shouldn't have felt most validated at that moment than when his brother or friends say it. But he did and it's okay. He thinks, that's all he needs to move on. And he even made a cute little video of supporting Sharon's new music video 'Dracula'.

* * *

The **first** **snippet** came the night before Justin got called in for All Stars. It was bad enough because things with Jarred were already rocky enough, he was the complete opposite of Justin- he was brash, he was aggressive, he was loud and he spends too much time at home.

Which is really the point of their argument- "we're rarely in the same country enough already, and now you wanna go film All Stars? What, so you can just be put second again?"

God, help him. Justin went to bed with both of them quite upset. The first snippet was of his soulmate browsing a vinyl shop, it looked like a new shop, and vinyl doesn't sound too tacky, right? And his soulmate's phone is an iPhone so that's not bad, because most everyone is with an iPhone these days.

Justin decided, All Stars would be good for him, so he accepted. And then maybe he should break up with Jarred too.

...

But Jarred has been so understanding lately. He's even helped Justin pack, and he's promised not to spread the fact that Justin is away.

...

Justin was counting now. It's been seven weeks since the night of his first snippet, last night was his seventh. He finds out that his soulmate loves going out; vinyl shop, olive gardens, chipotle, local dispensary, fabric shops- it's almost like his soulmate was trying to avoid being home...

Which is fine but weird.

And the pattern makes him even more anxious than deliberating which Queen to send home- his snippets only come once a week for goodness' sake.

* * *

_**October 7, 2016 - After the Makeover Episode;** _

Hate. Hate everywhere.

Scrutiny. Judgement.

Snake.

If this is what it felt like to be Phi Phi- it was scary, horrible, and traumatizing.

There were randoms in Twitter and Facebook threatening to kill him, or rob him, or hack his account.

Katya visits his house, with her other half in tow- texting ahead of time;

"we love you... it's gonna be okay" Trixie says

"those people are just crazy, do you wanna do a live?" Katya suggests, at which, Trixie glares at him.

Michelle visits too, unannounced;

"Bots is coming in November... I..."

"I can't" Alaska cuts her off

Detox comes over too, via spare key;

"bitch, get yourself together, we're filming Reunited soon, didn't you get the email?"

This continued, until Alaska had to fly to Roscoes, where she'll be appearing for a live viewing- with Katya for the finale.

_'They're gonna crown, either me, or her...'_

* * *

After filming the reunion, and the hate had died down a bit- mostly because of Trixya's Look at Huh episode, Alaska decided, that yes, she'll be doing BOTS this November. She was still getting snippets; the soulmate was trying sobriety apparently.

When it came time for Sharon to join the BOTS tour, Chad was surprisingly not accompanying her. Tomorrow is the official day they're going to be rehearsing to fit Sharon into the routine, but tonight, it was Aaron making an appearance in the backstage. From there, the queens can hear Alaska singing 'The T'.

There was something weird though, because Alaska usually purposefully falters in her vocals. This didn't sound like it's on purpose.

Aaron stands behind Katya, as the faux-Russian queen unblinkingly watches the Snake Queen from the wings. "I feel like she's gonna fall down any second..."

Aaron nods, Alaska was pale as fuck, but why?

"I think she hasn't been sleeping..." Trixie states

"woah, woah, woah, look-out!" Katya exclaimed

But Aaron was already on his way to the stage. Good idea too though, because Alaska just literally quite passed out. Aaron had to skid on his knees wearing jeans, to catch the queen. And there were cameras flashing-

wait.

no.

this white light wasn't from the cameras flashing.

it was them.

They were glowing.

Katya and Trixie were in two completely different states of shock. The crowd, even more so- it was so obviously not a trick of the light, because the spotlight the stage had was blue, purple and yellow. Shit.

Shit Shit Shit

When the ten seconds of white light were up, Aaron carried Alaska bridal style, to the backstage. They have a ton of shit to talk about, then.

"when?"

"when what?"

"when? snippets started, when?"

"November 2015... I got snippets, like, every two weeks, I definitely didn't believe it at first. But I think, deep down, I knew I had to break up with Chad. You... when did you start?"

"Before All stars was filmed... Last year..."

"so, October, then? okay"

"what do we do now?" Alaska asks him

Aaron hands her a pack of makeup wipes. "Well, I need to get my shit together first-

"you do"

"and then, we'll see, okay?"

"just so you know... if you ever need help with withdrawal... There's always Katya you can ask for help" Alaska laughs

"bitch!"

"kidding, there's me, you have my number... I promise I'll text you with more than a few words, for real..."

"We could be best friends, again, for real though, right?" Aaron asks

"of course"


	5. A/N

I'm working on the Rajila now.

* * *

Okay, so I'm messing around with some HTML stuff, work skins, hex codes, and etcetera... As you can see from the layout. I'm proud of that, but if the fic is hard to read for any of y'all, just send a message!


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